ROLES

What is your role, in life? What are roles? Roles are defined as positons, the part someone has in a family, group or society. Some refer to roles, symbolically, as hats. Most people wear multiples hats; a parent, spouse, sibling, etc. And, for each specific role, there is a specific purpose.

What is your purpose in life?  Purposes are the reasons why something is performed, or the goal of a person. Many may refer to their purpose as their destiny, or their fate in life.

Who you are represents your role. Whatever your goal in life is your purpose. People go through half their lives, or more, trying to figure out their destiny, thinking they were put on this earth to find out who there are and what they should do. Many people will go to their graves never realizing what their purpose was in life. Don’t let this be you.

The first obligation is to learn who you are. After the identification has been acknowledged, then you can view your purpose. God is the One to be sought after, for your identification recognition and ultimate purpose in life.

 For I know the plans and thoughts that I have for you,’ says the Lord, ‘plans for peace and well-being and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 Amplified Bible (AMP).

I am going to make it simple, for the believers. You are the righteousness of God. And, once you learn, know, and accept that identity, then you can begin to acknowledge and receive all the love, blessings, gifts, opportunities, and protection that comes with that role.

For he hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him. 2 Corinthians 5:21 King James Version (KJV).

People hear this truth, clearly. It is not your purpose in life. It’s God’s purpose, for you, in life, to perform His will; His ultimate purpose. When you perform His will, things will work out. Even when you make mistakes; wrong choices; or go astray.

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 King James Version (KJV).

To avoid those realizations, trouble follow. If you don’t know who you are, or, what your initial role should be, then there is no way to know your goal in life.

You will allow others to dictate who they think you should be; and what they think you should be doing. Of course, parents and family members play a significant role in role identity. But what happens when they are struggling with their identity. What then?

You dive head first in multiple roles that may not be suited for you. You plunge into a relationship (possibly your partner is just as lost as you are); get married, you have become a spouse. Shortly, afterwards; a child is born, you have become a parent. Money is needed. You must work. You have become an employee (possibly at a job you don’t really like).

Now, you have 3 hats to wear, in a short time. And, remember that doesn’t include other roles as sibling, aunt, uncle, son, daughter, or friend.

All of these hats are put on and snatched off. Never fully learning the meaning of any of the roles or their targeted purpose. You may discover you don’t want to be a parent or spouse, performing the duties that accompany those positions. You were led into them because someone told you to go. Or, maybe you thought that is what you should do, never knowing for sure.

Identity crises can result in bad relationships or divorce. Each spouse believes it is up to the other partner to fulfill their happiness. Not understanding the role of a parent,abused children can come out of it. Quickly, when the word abuse is mentioned, instantly, sexual and physical abuse comes to mind. Abuse also means to treat in a way that causes harm. Verbal abuse, saying derogatory remarks; mental abuse, filling the child with threats, wrong information or ignorance. Neglect, allowing other siblings to solely take care of other siblings; or a parent fails to give attention when needed; or doting on one specific child, disregarding the others.

You wore the various hats for a short period of time and now you have become frustrated or angry. You are exhausted being everything to everyone. Now, everything becomes about you. Your sole role is to seek people or carry out activities, to make you feel good about yourself, all the time.

You may begin to:

1. Purchase items or go places, knowing you really can’t afford it.
2. Entangle yourself in meaningless relationships; if married, extra martial affairs.
3. Party excessively with friends.
4. Indulge in drinking, drugs, or other mind altering substances.
5. Complain and bicker about how your life sucks.
6. Become a martyr. Exaggerating sufferings to gain attention, praise, or sympathy.
7. Constantly telling anyone who will listen about your trials or sorrows.
8. Become the victim in every story and situation.
9. Reside in a world of “woe is me”.

For those who have discovered they donned the wrong hats? You can’t divorce your spouse, give up your children and live the life of the unattached. But, you can:

• Learn who you are. Read and study the Holy Bible. Talk to wisdom filled individuals.
• Know your purpose. Remember it is not your purpose. It is what God wants you to do, to fulfill His purpose. Study the Word of God.
• Renovate your mind in learning how to become a better person first, God is the guide.
• Learn about the hats you have chosen to wear. Become a better you. Read up on being a spouse, parent, etc. Seek help. Talk to successful people have worn various hats and came out blessed. The more you learn about a subject the easier the task becomes. Do not discuss your situation with people who donned the same hats as yourself, if they are depressed and stressed. It will not help.

Have a conversation with yourself. Be honest with yourself. Do you really want to change? Are you willing to do what it takes? Are you willing to spend the time needed? If you fail, are you willing to try again? Go to the root of the problem, where it all began. Know who you are in God. Know His purpose. Pray for His guidance. Seek His direction.

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. ⁶ In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Proverbs 3:5-6 King James Version (KJV).